“I Feel So Ugly”

It can be inconceivable to some that the most beautiful women strutting down the runways are plagued with insecurities. It can be inconceivable to some that our most admired female celebrities, who seem to have it all, could spend time focusing on their flaws. What I’ve come to learn for myself is that so many women are on a quest to truly loving themselves. It’s a quest that has a beginning, but I’m not sure if it truly ever has an end.

Bianca Golden, a contestant on America’s Next Top Model, Cycle 9, wrote a candid post on her blog about her own quest to truly loving herself. The following is an excerpt.

There have been many times on set when I have heard a photographer say, “Give me sexy,” and I think to myself, “How can I give you sexy when I just learned what being beautiful is?”

I get questions everyday on my social sites from young women asking me for advice or just wanting to tell someone their struggle with feeling awkward or just trying to learn to love themselves. For a very long time, I was unable to provide any guidance because I was struggling with the same issues myself. I grew up always being the tallest girl amongst my peers; being the skinniest, not having the best clothing, and always wanting to feel accepted, but never feeling beautiful. Never missing a beat, I maintained a false believable display of confidence because I never wanted to be perceived as being low in confidence. This was my reality and still is for a lot of young women today.

I work among the most strikingly beautiful women in the world, but on the inside, they’re the same girl I was and putting up the same façade. Why is it that the women society deems as the epitome and blueprint for beauty also question their looks and claim to have more flaws than the average woman? I don’t have the answers, but I do know that all women want to be “beautiful.” No one wants to be considered “ugly.” Maybe that’s why reality TV star, Heidi Montag, underwent 10 surgical procedures in one day to become what “beautiful” is to her. Is that why so many young women are getting backyard procedures such as nose jobs, breast implants, and the new craze of butt enhancements?

To read Bianca Golden’s very insightful post in its entirety, visit her blog at www.biancagoldenonline.blogspot.com.